'Stupidity' author caught soliciting minor online
By Antigone Barton, Palm Beach Post Staff Writer

LANTANA -- James F. Welles wrote the book on stupidity -- two, in fact -- and then he proved he knew what he was talking about, police say.

The 61-year-old author of The Story of Stupidity and Understanding Stupidity had written extensively about the dumb moves people make, so when he made a date with a 15-year-old girl he met over the Internet, he tried to be cautious.

"We can't be lovey-dovey in public," the stupidity expert explained to his new young friend. "Bottom line, I'm committing a crime."

She could call him "Dad" when they met at a Denny's in Lantana, said Welles, who also has a Ph.D in biology. Then they could go to his car and have sex, he suggested -- but backed away from that plan when he realized his windows were not tinted enough to ensure privacy.

In any case, the date fell apart Friday evening when he was greeted at Denny's by two uniformed police officers.

For the last three weeks the author had been corresponding, in increasingly explicit terms, not with a teenage girl but with a 40-year-old male detective, going slightly gray at the temples, sitting in an office at the Lantana Police Department.

The relationship began in an Internet chat room, Detective Todd Dwyer said Thursday.

Dwyer, who has arrested six other men since April on charges of soliciting children for sex through the Internet, isn't sure which chat room it was -- he goes to a lot of different ones: " 'I love older men,' 'men and boys,' " he tosses off, "special interests."

Soon Dwyer, who had logged on as a teenage girl, got an instant message from Welles, who asked for a description.

"I was just average, 5-foot 4-inches, about 118 pounds," the detective said. "I didn't make myself a knockout or anything like that."

"He went on to say he would like to meet me to coach me in tennis, tutor me in biology or give me singing lessons," Dwyer wrote in his arrest report. "Welles gradually worked his way from coach/tutor to a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship." But, Dwyer noted, Welles, who has a condo in Pompano Beach, remained concerned "about how we would be seen in public."

On the other hand, Welles figured out a bright side to their supposed age difference: They would escape notice because no one would believe the two could be attracted to each other.

It took about three weeks to get to the point he was willing to commit a crime, Dwyer said.

In the meantime, he bragged to his new friend about his work, directing Dwyer to www.stupidity.com, which touts his The Story of Stupidity, subtitled A History of Western Idiocy From The Days of Greece To The Moment You Saw This Book. A link on that Web site takes a visitor to the table of contents for the book. Chapters include Greek Stupidity, Roman Stupidity, Medieval Stupidity, Stupidity Reborn, Stupidity Reformed, Reasonable Stupidity, Enlightened Stupidity, Industrial Stupidity and The Age of Arrogance.

"Unfortunately," a passage in that last chapter ponders, "the arrogance inherent in this 'We can do anything' attitude came to characterize the general stupidity of our age and contributed to the monumental problems we have created for ourselves."

Still, Welles continued to fret over how he and his new acquaintance would behave in public when they met, the detective said.

It was Dwyer who suggested he could simply pose as "Dad."

"That's a great plan!" he said Welles responded.

Welles was spotted speeding more than 80 miles an hour, zig-zagging through traffic on I-95 to his date Friday evening, according to the arrest report.

Instead, he wound up at the Lantana police station, where he gave a taped statement to police, saying he knew it was wrong to have sex with a minor, but that was what he had hoped to do. He likes girls under 18, he told police.

"He was always aware this could be a set up," Dwyer said. Welles, who had concluded in his 1988 book that "stupidity is a necessary evil," worried in his Internet messages about "the state of Florida looming in the background."

"Yep," Dwyer agreed, it did seem kind of stupid for him to go ahead with the plan, anyway. "He just has no common sense, I guess."

Or, as Welles put it, in the epilogue to The Story of Stupidity: "... our schemas define the way we perceive and interact with our environment while preventing us from learning more about it and ourselves."

Contestant removed from pageant due to her non-U.S. citizenship
By Rob Golub, The Journal Times, Racine County

RACINE -- The Miss Racine pageant has asked one of its 14 contestants to withdraw from the competition because she is not a U.S. citizen.

An e-mail to The Journal Times, from a friend of another candidate, prompted questions to pageant coordinator Therese Van Ryne about citizenship requirements.

After consulting Miss America pageant officials, Van Ryne learned her contestants must be U.S. citizens. As a result, Van Ryne asked Jaclyn Foster, a 17-year-old citizen of Canada, to withdraw from the competition.

Miss Racine 2003 will be selected and crowned Nov. 16 in a ceremony at St. Catherine's High School.

Foster will not participate.

"I don't know whether to say I'm frustrated or disappointed," said Jaclyn, a senior at The Prairie School. "I put in so much time and money and energy. I was having so much fun."

Jaclyn said she had asked Van Ryne about citizenship and was assured it would not be a problem.

Jaclyn said she borrowed a costume, spent $150 on an interview suit and shoes, and attended three-hour practice sessions each Sunday for about six weeks. She and other contestants reviewed their talents, learned pageant walking, and gave mock interviews.

All contestants must learn about a platform for on-stage interviews. Jaclyn's platform was "fighting obesity in children through physical education." She also learned a lyrical jazz dance solo.

"I was ready to do this and then I can't anymore," Jaclyn said.

Van Ryne said she very much regrets the error. "This is the first time I've encountered the issue of U.S. citizenship," she said. "It has obviously been a huge learning experience for me. I'm saddened that Jaclyn won't be able to participate this year."

The winner of the Miss Racine pageant goes on to compete in the Miss Wisconsin pageant, which selects someone for the Miss America pageant. It's why the contestants must be citizens, said John Schultz, co-executive director of Miss Wisconsin.

"It's because it's Miss America," he said. "You wouldn't want someone Miss America who wasn't American."

Van Ryne had thought a noncitizen could win for Miss Racine if she intended to become a citizen before the Miss Wisconsin competition. But Schultz said Miss Racine must be a U.S. citizen the moment she wins.

Jaclyn hopes to apply for citizenship in May when a waiting period runs out. She has lived in Racine for about six years.

"I think she's got a terrific talent and she is a terrific communicator," Van Ryne said. "I strongly encouraged her and will continue to encourage her to apply again and participate with the program when she is a U.S citizen."

"I erred on the side of inclusiveness. I made a mistake and wanted to include her in this group of people."