Italians Yawn at Too Wholesome Contest
ROME (Reuters) - Italians have much to complain about these days. Prices are rising, jobs are scarce and the "country of the sun" has been swamped by rain this summer.
But along with the highs and lows of the mercury and the economy, another moan this past week has been that the Miss Italy pageant, one of the country's most hallowed institutions, is producing girls that are, well, just too wholesome.
Italians are just plain tired of the girl-next-door, which they like to call "acqua e sapone" (soap and water look) and apparently want more sex, spice and suspense in their misses.
So great was the disappointment over the four-day pageant, which ended Monday night, that one mainstream national newspaper branded it "Miss Yawn 2002."
The television audience share plummeted by two million viewers over last year and commentators and newspapers put the blame on goodness.
"Too many girls seemed to be reciting from a script -- God, country and family," said Fabrizio Del Noce, head of RAI state television's Channel One, which broadcast the pageant.
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My guest sponsor today is the distinguished W. Shakespeare.

O MISTRESS mine, where are you roaming?
O stay and hear! your true-love's coming
That can sing both high and low;
Trip no further, pretty sweeting,
Journeys end in lovers meeting —
Every wise man's son doth know.

What is love? 'tis not hereafter;
Present mirth hath present laughter;
What's to come is still unsure:
In delay there lies no plenty,—
Then come kiss me, Sweet-and-twenty,
Youth's a stuff will not endure.